Let’s face it, you guys. Reading can be super exhausting. I don’t think it’s fair that only children get books with few or zero words in them. Kids are so spoiled. They’re all “Waaah! I need a picture book! I don’t know how to read!” Well, I don’t see why I can’t afford the same luxury to my blog followers. Especially the slow readers and the illiterate ones.
So, starting today, in addition to my normal periodic blog posts, I’ll be posting quick snippets from real life, everyday L-I-V-I-N’. They’ll be short and sweet, just like Danny Devito would be if you dipped him in a vat of sugar. Anyway, sometimes I want to share tid-bits (random happenings, quotes or pictures) on the blog, but I don’t because they’re not full-post-worthy. Problem solved with the new snippet system. Sometimes I might share one tid-bit per snippet and sometimes I’ll share several.
Here are the expected benefits of the new post category:
- I’ll get to post more often without sacrificing precious
TV watchingexercising time. - My progression toward getting carpal tunnel syndrome will slow as a result of less typing.
- I won’t feel like I can’t share something on my blog simply because there’s not a big story behind it. Sometimes things are funnier or just as interesting without a long, drawn out explanation.
Be forewarned: these posts may not always be overtly funny, especially if I use more pictures than words. If you’re not willing to put forth the effort to imagine what hilarious commentary I could add, then maybe you and I weren’t meant to have a blogging relationship. I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it! Come back! Now, not only will some of these posts not be overtly funny, but some won’t even be remotely funny. These would cover things like deep thoughts, nature photos, announcements of significant life events and cute pictures of my dog. I like to call this “snippet diversification.” Catching onto the new lingo, yet?
Alrighty, here’s your first snippet!
***
Tuesday night, I came home to find water all over the floor in the guest bathroom. After much investigative work and over-the-phone help from my dad to determine what was causing the leak, I began performing my first ever plumbing duties. It wasn’t my favorite. However, despite the nastiness of it all, it turned out pretty well. I learned the basics of taking apart the underbelly of a sink (no idea what all that junk is called) and discovered a new, innovative clog-clearing tool:
Chopsticks! Please don’t hate me for grossing you out.
This weekend I’ll get to fix my toilet that broke a few days before the sink.
*****
My new dog loves sleeping under blankets. She manages to wriggle under them on her own and I always get a kick out of it.
Dog? Or mummy?
*****
A few weeks ago, my roommate Allison and I were talking to my dad about speed dating. I was explaining that I don’t want to speed date because I feel that the type of guy I’d want to date wouldn’t go to one of those events. Then he said “What? You mean Travis Tritt wouldn’t speed date??” Allison and I sneered and were left speechless. He continued… “I thought he was that doctor guy you like.” No, that would be Travis Stork. Vast difference. Laughter ensued.
Travis Stork: Good
Travis Tritt: Not really my type
*****
Oh look! It’s already time for our first significant life event announcement! Come November, my brother and his wife will be having their first baby! And I’ll have my first nephew! I can’t wait. I’ve been an aunt to my niece for nearly 11 years now, so I’ve got the girly stuff down. I’m not sure what kinds of things he and I will do though. Maybe once he’s older, I’ll teach him all about plumbing and he can teach me about sports. Perfect trade.
This was a fun new format. Congrats on your impending status as the aunt of a nephew
Thanks Paprika! I’m excited to be an aunt again!
I agree with Paprika. I prefer the shorter, more to-the-point posts. The longer ones get stuck in my queue until I have a long stretch of time for reading. That may be a week or more. By then, I’ve completely missed the comment party. See? Look. I’m the second one here.
That was a too funny Travis mix-up. And congrats…new babies are the bomb (as long as it’s not me having one). As for that stuff your dad pulled out with chopsticks, uh, we have a word for that.
http://dirtnkids.wordpress.com/2012/02/22/stalagmah/
That’s exactly how I feel about the long posts. It’s hard to get through them with so many good blogs to read, too. My queue gets longer and longer every week. I usually end up reading most of them on the weekend and then I feel the same way- everyone’s already commented and it’s old news.
Oooh stalagmuck! I’m so happy I can call that stuff by its proper name now
Thanks for the congrats! Can’t wait to meet him!
My bathtub is making that suspicious stalagmuck sound. I’m suspecting more hair involved than glittery paste poo on this one. I’m goin’ in…
LOL with the two travises lol.
That picture of Travis Tritt gets me every time. Every. Single. Time.
Travis Tritt just looks so happy in that picture! Lovin life, lovin his boots.
I almost barfed when I saw the hair clog.
I’ve never seen someone look so happy, especially when sporting a mullet of that magnitude. Not to mention the jean vest.
I’m sorry for the clog picture. I probably lost some readers with that. Poor judgment on my part. If it makes you feel any better, that was one of the less awful pictures.
I like your snippets. I do something similar with my Lazy Blog Day posts, but yours sounds more sophisticated, and mine is because, well, because I’m just being lazy.
Loved the picture of your blanketed dog. It’s a wonder she can breathe in there!
Thanks! I like the name of your short posts. You’re being honest with your readers. Having the ability to post short ones between the regular posts takes the pressure off. After 5 or 6 days have passed since my last post, I start feeling obligated to write, even if I don’t feel like it.
I’m amazed she can breathe under those blankets, too. Sometimes her head is completely buried under a thick comforter for hours and she’s perfectly content.
Travis Tritt — hilarious! Is he even still around? If he is, I hope his hair isn’t. I still laugh in remembering his very dramatic, poorly acted music videos.
I’ve tried to write much shorter posts now than I did in the past. I usually have a rule to never exceed 800 words. More often I try to keep posts under 400-500. It’s liberating, isn’t it? Well done with your first snippets! And congrats on the baby/nephew news!
Now I have to go throw up after seeing what was clogging your sink.
I don’t know if TT is still around. I’m not sure if I’ve heard his name on the radio because he has anything new out or if they’re just playing old stuff. I have a feeling it’s old stuff. A guy like that can’t compete with the non-mulleted types these days.
Thanks for the congrats! And yeah, knowing I can just throw a picture on the blog without any actual words is just that…liberating. My life has changed.
I’m sorry for making you throw up. Looking back, maybe I should’ve pasted a smiley face over that part of the picture. Or just not posted it at all.
I was just teasing, Carly — rest assured, you’re never going to make me throw up with something so tame as a drain clogger. I have two cats, a dog and two young children. I’m up to my elbows in poop, hairballs and boogers every single day. I welcome seeing anything that I don’t have to clean up.
I happen to right now be writing a post about mullets. Travis Tritt could be my inspiration, I suppose.
Haha! Oh good, I was starting to worry I may have scared a few people off. I didn’t think it was that bad, but then again I had already touched it so the grossness had worn off.
I can’t wait for the mullet post. I’m sure you could use just about any country artist from the ’90′s as inspiration.
Yes, I think there might still be some country singers sporting them.
I’m trying to trim down my posts a bit, too. We’ll see how that goes. I have an awful lot of crap to spew out into the interwebs.
It’s so hard to write a short post when you want to say everything about everything, huh? I’m trying to practice self control with what I include and don’t include. Or at least split up a long post into 2 or 3 if needed. Easier said than done!
Ha! I bust out laughing about the two Travis confusion. Love the short and sweet Danny Devito. I’ve had people tell me mine are way too long so I am trying the same.
Congrats on being a new auntie to your nephew!
It’s so hard to keep them short sometimes, especially when you want to make sure the whole thing flows well. When I first started blogging, I wasn’t thinking about word count once and one of my posts was like 2,500 words long. I think all of 10 people read it and I don’t blame those who didn’t read it one bit. I really don’t know what I was thinking. Oh well, live and learn.
Thank you! I’m so excited to be an auntie again!
As a functional illiterate, I approve of your decision. Not that you need the approval of the woefully uneducated.
Haha! I refuse to believe you’re a functional illiterate. I’ve read your blog and there’s no way it’s written by the woefully uneducated.
Travis Stork is awesome.. And congrats on being a new aunt! Sounds so exciting
Thank you! I can’t wait to meet the little guy.
And I’m glad I’m not the only one who sees how awesomeTravis is. If you haven’t already come across it, sometime you’ll have to read the post I wrote about him several months ago. Here’s the link: http://curlycarly.com/2011/09/23/the-definition-of-perfection-travis-stork/
Thanks for reading, too!
I find it hard to believe you’d have that much hair in your U pipe when you’ve got so much on your head. A real mystery.
Well…believe it or not, that was in the guest bathroom. It was actually mostly filled with insulation from the attic (long story), but it’s hard to tell in that picture. I wouldn’t be surprised if my drain looked the exact same.
I’m digging the snippets idea! These are fun! Your dog is very cute and hilarious.
And way to go for fixing a clog, mad props to you, lady! Congrats on being a second-time auntie!!
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