I’m perfectly willing to admit that, in a lot of ways, I’m not your typical twenty-something female. I guess I missed the memo on how to be a 21st century woman. I can completely understand why men are so frequently baffled by their counterparts.
This afternoon I was watching “Say Yes to the Dress” on TLC. If you’re not familiar, this is a show that documents women shopping for their wedding dresses. Although I generally don’t understand the hype that goes along with wedding-related affairs, I actually enjoy this show. I would describe it as an entertaining documentary… and who doesn’t love a good documentary?? (Answer: people who hate knowledge and learning).
It occurred to me that this show highlights several of the reasons I find many girls to be annoying. I want to say ahead of time that I’m aware I might offend some of my readers (the female half). So, here’s my disclaimer: Even if I disagree with your beliefs about weddings, that does not mean I don’t like you; it just means I would probably make different choices. I also don’t have anything against marriage or weddings. However, I do have a problem with women who talk about how much they want to be married, when clearly they care more about the wedding itself than their future husband.
Anyway, here are a few examples of the comments you might hear one of the show’s featured brides say:
“I know that this dress is really expensive, but I can’t help it…I have expensive taste.”
Umm…who doesn’t have expensive taste?? Given the choice between a low-priced good and a high-priced good, we all want the latter. That doesn’t mean it’s our right to have it. I mean, since when does wanting something mean that you’re automatically entitled to have it? This is where self-control comes into play. I hear girls use the term “expensive taste” often, and not just related to weddings. Most of the time, it’s obvious that their parents have brainwashed them into believing that they deserve the best of the best. Shame on them! I bet you’re wondering how to identify this type of woman. Here are some clues:
- her family calls her “princess.”
- her parents wouldn’t let her work during high school or college (which means she has no concept of the value of a dollar).
- when she was 16, she couldn’t understand why all of her friends didn’t get a $45,000 sports car for their birthdays like she did. She wonders if this is considered child abuse.
Good luck to the man who will have to support this type of lifestyle for the rest of his life.
“This dress is what I’ve been looking for my whole life. I know it’s ‘the one!’”
Shouldn’t you be making those types of comments about your fiancé? You do realize you’ll be wearing your dress for a day, right? I hope your husband is “the one,” too, although I’m not entirely sure you’ve contemplated that quite yet.
“My budget is $7,000.”
I understand that some people have great riches that they can spend on a grand, over-the-top wedding, but… seriously? I can tell from having watched the show for so long that a lot of people wouldn’t bat an eye at dropping this kind of money on a dress. I’m not one of them. I know that having a nice wedding is important to many families and cultures, and I don’t think there’s necessarily anything wrong with that, assuming they can afford it.* The part I take issue with is when women say this and then explain that their parents are taking out a second mortgage on their home or selling their body parts on the black market to cover the cost. When I think of all the things I could pay for instead, I simply can’t imagine being able to justify shelling out so much cash for colorless cloth (and perhaps some shiny beads), even if I was loaded.
“I brought my husband along to look at dresses because we do everything together.”
Gag.
“I won’t buy a dress that my kids don’t approve of.”
It’s not difficult to see who’s in charge in that family. My guess is that this type of woman also refers to her kids as “her best friends” and doesn’t believe in discipline.
“I have to get a dress that’s super sexy!”
It seems to me that the first message you communicate on the day you’re committing to someone for the rest of your life should not be “look how hot I am!” Is that really the type of attention you want as a married woman? The typical defense to this would be “but I want to look beautiful for my husband!” Ok, first of all, ‘hot’ and ‘beautiful’ are two completely different adjectives. Second of all, why does everyone else have to see that? Save it for the honeymoon.
“I’m here today to buy a second dress, because I’ve decided the first one I bought isn’t just right.”
What?? I can barely fathom the idea of buying a wedding dress that costs half of what most people pay, and you’re buying two?? Ok, princess.
*We’ll talk about the definition of “afford” in a future post.